QotD: Describe the sound of a moist waffle falling onto a hot griddle.

What to do with day-old waffles (or ones you left way too long in the freezer):

(Modify according to number of waffles)

Prepare griddle by brushing generously with olive oil or lard, depending upon your intentions for that tire around your middle. At the proper temperature, a drop of water should pop and skip over the surface. If it just sits there, griddle is too cold; if it evaporates in a loud puff of smoke, it’s too hot.

Whip one egg.
Add ½ cup milk, half and half, or cream, depending upon how your cholesterol is doing and whether your doctor has started you on Lipitor.
Beat in ½ teaspoon cinnamon and ½ cup sugar.
When mixture is frothy, dip waffle in, making sure to cover both sides.
Transfer to griddle.

At proper temperature, egg mixture will pop, spit and sizzle. After a moment, this will quiet down. But wait! There will be additional muffled pops as the mixture caught in the waffle’s little squares heat up and explode.

When nicely browned, flip the waffle over and brown the other side. You’ll be used to the spitting and sizzling by now and can safely fry the rest of the waffle rejects.

Sprinkle the browned waffles with powdered sugar. Slice up a few bananas and strawberries so you can pretend you’re eating healthy. Drown it all with syrup, jam, jelly or pie filling, according to preference. Whipped cream is never out of place.

Listen for yummy sounds.