QOD: Compose the lyrics to a new national anthem that features an animal sound at least once:

Think y’all heared enough o’ them ballads, folks. Gonna sing one now what was framed in this here holler, oh, some time ago. Seems they was this young’un name o’ Andy what lost his momma early on. If that warn’t enough, his daddy up ‘n’ sicken on him afore he even got peach fuzz on his chin. Done told that boy afore he died not to worry none—if’n he was ever in a pinch, his ol’ daddy’d wake up all them ol’ soljers out there to the cemetery, ‘n’ they’d come ridin’ to the rescue.

Andy gits most o’ his grievin’ done ‘n’ starts takin’ downright pride in this little flock o’ sheep his daddy done left him. ‘Bout this time, feller name o’ Grady show up in this ol’ white Caddy with a rickety van trailin’ behind. Some kinda cousin or somewhat, just passin’ through, he says, ‘n’ promised his ma he’d stop on by ‘n’ see how they all was a doin.’ Andy don’t remember no Grady in his daddy’s recollectin’ tales, but he give the man some supper ‘n’ offer him a bed.

Now this Grady has him a ratty lookin’ ol’ hound what looks like maybe it got spawned by a bear or somewhat. Nasty critter, barin’ his teeth ‘n’ slaverin’ away. Grady don’t offer to take him inside, but just tie him up next to the water pipe, give him a kick ‘n’ tell him lay down, which the dog do. ‘Course, when the lights goes out, that hound commences howlin’ like they ain’t no tomorrow. Grady give Andy this little metal whistle ‘n’ tell him to blow. Andy do, ‘n’ don’t hear nothing. No sound from the whistle ‘n’ the dog shuts hisself right up. Grady tells him put it in his pocket, ‘case he needs to blow it agin, ‘cause he hisself done learnt to sleep through hell blowin’ up on second street.

Middle o’ the night, Andy heared some kinda ruckus goin’ on, with that durn ol’ dog barkin’ ‘n’ growlin’ ‘n’ whatnot. Reaches for that magic whistle ‘n’ durn if it ain’t gone ‘n’ fell through a hole in his pocket. ‘Bout then he’s wakin’ up real good ‘n’ he see ol’ Grady ain’t in t’other bed. So he runs on out ‘n’ sees a sight plumb froze his blood good ‘n’ solid. That nasty ol’ dog is roundin’ up his sheep ‘n’ Grady’s got that van open ‘n’ he’s fixin’ to load ‘em up.

Andy’s in some kinda pickle there, ‘cause Grady’s a whole lot bigger’n him, ‘n’ he got that fearsome dog on top o’ that. Ain’t nobody livin’ closer’n a couple miles, so if’n he goes off for help, Grady’ll be long gone by the time they gits back. Now, ain’t nobody but Andy ‘n’ Grady to say what happen next, but both they stories got what you might call a sim-u-larity. Sound like thunder come first, some ways away. Gits closer ‘n’ they can make out hoofbeats. Purty soon they’s all around only they cain’t see nary a thing. Oh, that were somethin’ to scare a boy outa growth, if’n his daddy hadn’t give him the idea early on. ‘Course, Grady don’t know what it is, no more’n that nasty dog. You can bet they leave them sheep unloaded ‘n’ head off lickety split.

Sheriff ketched up with ol’ Grady next day. Seems he went off to hide in some ol’ cave he knew, but didn’t go figurin’ rightly on how much room that Caddy plus the van might need. Sorta skitter’d in sideways ‘n’ got hisself stuck good ‘n’ proper.

Andy, o’ course, were still gittin’ his schoolin’ over to Miz Bing’s, just like his daddy wanted. No more’n half a dozen or so young ‘uns then, but they’s wantin’ to commemorate Andy’s rescue. Miz Bing pulls out her ol’ Victerola ‘n’ finds a couple discs warn’t too bad warped. One o’ them’s got a Nati-somethin’ anthem on it what sound somehow familiar to Miz Bing, but she been missin’ a thing or three since that lightnin’ storm what singed her hair. Had to change the story just a bit to fit but Miz Bing say that ain’t naught but poetical license. Anyhow, give a listen, ‘cause here’s how it go:

Oh-ho say can your sheep dodge the dawg’s pearly bite
What so loudly done howled in the twilight last eve’nin’
Jumpin’ o’er the white car chewed the rope tied so tight
All the rams ‘n’ sheep ketched in his dastardly thievin’
Andy’s pocket done teared, the lambs baa-baa’d in fear
Grave hoofs through the night, Grady left his van there
Oh say does that ol’ car dangle halfway out the cave?
Grady ain’t no more free, Andy’s home ‘n’ sheep saved.